Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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