I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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