So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
