im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize