she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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