I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize