there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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