I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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