Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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