Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
