Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
How's work?
Spinning.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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