if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
