awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
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I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
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You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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