Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
