real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
He felt like a one man threesome
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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