Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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