I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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