shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I intend to get homeless drunk
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
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