So drunk its hurt
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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