i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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