she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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