How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
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It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
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Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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