We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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