She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
