Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize