Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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