One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
