I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
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