it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
