The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Randomize
