question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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