Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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