I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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