we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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