is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
