in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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