So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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