Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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