We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
