Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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