his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk