Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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