Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
