Hey man sorry I got all grabby
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize
