and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
