He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
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I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
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The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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