Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
