Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I need to calm my uterus...
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
