He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Let's paint friendship bongs
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
