How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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