she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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